Sep 19, 2006

I heart NY!

Just a quick note to say I'm surviving up here in NYC. It was hot and muggy today but that didn't keep us from trekking across the Brooklyn Bridge, visiting Pier 17, Seaport, Ground Zero, Chinatown, Little Italy, Wash. Square park, Greenwich Village, and Chelsea.

The blisters on my feet have blisters....and I even wore my good Nurse shoes!

Will blog more later!

Sep 17, 2006

"Start Spreading the news...."

"......I'm leaving today
I want to be a part of it,
New York, New York"

Well actually I'm leaving tomorrow.
I can't be more excited....and nervous. It's been a couple of years since I've flown. It's been...never.... Since I've been apart from Ari for more then 2 days. I'll blog about my adventures and post pics after I get back on the 24th.

My sister, Jamie and her love Marcus (I call them Jamicus) got married yesterday. Congrats to them! Aren't they cute?

Do we look alike?

(Yeah...she's way cuter then me in this picture!)


I also want you bloggers out there to have this link:

Bluebird Blogs

A contest to get a new design for your blog!

Happy Trails!

Listening to:
"Elsewhere" by Sarah McLachlan

Sep 11, 2006

Patriot Day

When I volunteered to write with 2996 on Sept 11, I had no idea how difficult it would be. I researched my assigned person, Gregory T. Spagnoletti for weeks. I found out a little bit about this man who suffered a terrible fate when the World Trade Center was attacked and collapsed in NY city.

I think the best way to pay tribute to him is to share with you what I found out.

He had a great smile.

His friends called him "Greg" or "Spags".

He worked for Keefe, Bruyette, and Woods as a Bond Salesman.

He was the 3rd Brother of Four.

They were all big hockey Fans.

He organized hockey games at Chelsea Piers.

Out of the 4 Brothers, he was called the "responsible" one.

He was known for dropping in to have coffee with his tailor.

He was engaged to be married to Gretchen Zurn.

They had just fixed up their new Apartment on West 72nd st, and he was very proud of it. His family said it would take him 45 minutes to give you the tour of all 1200 sq. feet.

His parents started the Gregory T. Spagnoletti Memorial Foundation. You can donate to it by sending to:
Gregory T. Spagnoletti Memorial Foundation

62 Wolff Street
Waterbury, CT 06708

But the biggest thing I found out about Greg was that this man was definitely loved. He is definitely missed.

He like all Americans had no idea as he got up and went to work 5 years ago that America was going to change that day. He had no idea that those 2 towers, which have represented the NYC skyline for 30 years, could ever possibly be brought down by terrorists. Those Towers would become his tomb. He was on the 89th floor of the South Tower when it went down. It took officials almost 2 years to identify some remains and return them to his family for burial.

Five years ago I can say I was thinking about you as I watch the towers collapse on TV. But mostly I was thinking about Gretchen and the future she had lost with you. I was thinking about the children she would never have with you. I knew you were in a better place but I knew all too well the horrible place your loved ones were in. I prayed that God be with them on that day. I want you to know that America won't forget what happened what happened to you and 2995 other innocent people.

To my readers,

Please visit 2996 to find links to 2996 bloggers who have paid tributes to the victims of 9/11.

Sep 4, 2006

The Art of Grieving

Mike and Tristan-cat 1997

"There are no mistakes, no coincidences. All events are blessings given to us to learn from. "

"It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth - and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up, we will then begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had. "

~Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

My late husband Mike died five years ago today.

Of all the anniversaries,this one's the hardest.
There's something about the smell of the September air, the Back to school/Labor day advertising, the weather changing... that will bring me right back to that horrible day I woke up and found him gone.

Five years ago he wasn't supposed to go that quickly....The doctors had said it would take about a year for those little metastatic tumors in his lungs to kill him. What the doctors didn't count on was the palliative Chemo killing him early. I think he had had enough too.

I believe your spirit and will to live can keep you going....Mike was tired of the pain.
He had a bad reaction to the chemo and when it made it hard for him to swallow, eat, and drink....he just didn't try. I don't blame him for not.

It was almost like a gift from him...not to have to watch him suffer any longer.
Five Years has made me stronger, more resilient. Things slide off my back now that wouldn't have then.

In Five Years I went from unemployed to a college graduate and a member of a respected profession. I still wonder if I would have gone back to school if his loss hadn't of given me the opportunity, confidence, and the initiative.

Five years has actually made it harder for Ari. She understands more now, the older she gets. She understands how she stands out among her peers...having a Daddy in Heaven.

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross lists the 5 stages of grieving as:

1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression

5. Acceptance

I went through all of these....several times in various orders. I did finely come to rest on acceptance.

I accept that he is gone. It doesn't make me miss him less. It doesn't make me less lonely. It doesn't make it just make the pain of his loss softer.

Time doesn't heal all wounds...just makes them more tolerable.